Protect your relationships they’re important.

By Amanda Shiflett

One of the worst things you can do as a ministry leader or Pastor is to post or FB Live about something that was discussed with you in private by one of your congregants, even if you are trying to do it to make a point about something or give advice. They will know you are talking about them, and so will many others in the congregation.

This is the quickest way to lose someone’s trust. If you want to make a point about something that was discussed, wait several months, or even years to discuss the subject openly so it will not be obvious. Also, do not make a teaching or sermon out of it to share with others…again, at least for some time.  Those who were in your confidence will feel thrown under the bus, and that is not something you as a leader need to do for the sake of wanting to “share” your thoughts/ opinions or teach on something. Once trust is lost, it is hard to regain. When this kind of thing happens, it shows immaturity on a high level, and can ruin what God is trying to do.

This can also be true with ministry friends/relationships. Protect your relationships…they are important! Don’t put subjects out there that have been discussed in private, especially if you don’t know how to make it subtle and not obvious. You may not be as slick as you think you are!

There is something that many “young” ministers and leaders haven’t even heard of (“young” meaning they haven’t been in the ministry long). It’s called a “Pastors Code of Ethics”. It talks about the integrity and upright behavior befitting a man or woman of God. Here is a portion that discusses guarding information that you have received from someone…

“Guard confidences carefully. Communicate truthfully and discreetly when asked about individuals with destructive or sinful behavior patterns. Tell the truth, or remain discreetly silent: “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret” (Proverbs 11:13). This type of “discretion” needs to be used, even when it is not a sinful behavior being discussed, but simply something that a person is going through personally.

Many young Leaders & Pastors need to go back and begin to understand some of these things that they think are just a part of religious structure but in reality, they are to guard and protect others from being hurt, injured, or maligned by leadership. This is the type of training that is grossly missing in today’s fast ministry culture. Many “young” leaders need to be taught and admonished by the older on many of these things, and they need to listen to those who are wiser and more seasoned. It will help prevent a lot of hurt, misunderstanding, and distrust in the body of Christ.

I believe many of these types of things are happening more frequently because you have so many who are being places in leadership positions prematurely, without the proper training, and some when they haven’t even been saved for 10 years yet! This is not wisdom, and not healthy for the body of Christ.

To sum up many young leaders need to mature in the things of the Lord, but also in how they deal with other situations in ministry. Be teachable, listen to and seek out wise council.  Those doing the training and teaching of these “young” ministers and leaders do not place them into position before they are ready, or before they have learned critical information and training about what to do, and what NOT to do in ministry.

Amanda Shiflett is a heralding voice of truth, holiness, and purity within the prophetic, and calls others to stand in a place of no compromise in their callings. She longs to see reformation come to the prophetic movement, as well as the other parts of the 5-fold within the body of Christ.

www.propheticreformer.com

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